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Archive for the ‘Movies’ Category

Sam Who?

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Who is this Sam Worthington fellow and why is he friggin’ everywhere? He cannot act, doesn’t look good, lacks charisma. He doesn’t even have all the qualities that’ll make him an everyman. Like, say, Dennis Quaid. So what is he doing in this business, taking away lead roles from people who should be doing them?

While I’m at it, Christian Bale is similarly hopeless. We don’t need new idiots playing good parts. Give them all to Will Smith. At least we’re used to him.

Written by Jesus Eastwood

July 17, 2009 at 9:49 am

“Inspired By Einstein.”

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For sheer comic value, you can’t beat your local newspaper’s bling section. You know, the one where the pages are mostly filled with celebrities and their all-important opinions and quotes.

One of today’s headlines goes, “I was inspired by Einstein.” By one (I was a Black Eyed Pea!) William (with periods and random capitalizations in there somewhere). Regarding his role in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Now, you and I both know this is all manufactured, but you’d think whoever was getting paid for this would come up with something better. It’s a minor role in a summer blockbuster spin-off of a moderately enjoyable franchise that might, at best, be a good couple of wasted hours. Not the second coming of Kafka.

All William did was be famous and get cast for it, then show up on set and pretend he knew what this acting thing was all about. Einstein, he’d punch the writer of this sorry sop in the face and call it a relative improvement.

Written by Jesus Eastwood

May 18, 2009 at 9:50 am

Content Overload

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One of the privileges of modern computing is nearly unlimited space. Where once you’d meticulously delete things, now you can afford to let it stay there. Where once watching a DVDRip meant either burning it to a CD right after (if it was good) or clicking it, pressing SHIFT+DEL and hitting ENTER (if it sucked or was just not worth the cost of the burning media), now it gets lumped into a folder called Seen and promptly forgotten.

Unless it’s good. In which case the folder is called Good Movies, and is eventually burnt to DVD along with five others.

Having access to all this content is wonderful; especially in this country of poverty – the internet as a great unifier, hail Web 2.0. But the flip side is, a lot of this content loses its worth.

There’s just so much to see! We simply don’t have time to watch every movie the way it deserves to be seen (whether it’s good or bad): from the beginning to the end without any other distractions.

So these days there’s a movie playing nearly everyday in the background while I do other work. Like writing blog posts. Most of these movies are the ones you’d never want to watch again, of course, but you gotta wonder: what if you miss out on that rare supposed B-grader that’s actually worth its footprint because you’re too distracted with the latest dose of science fiction nostalgia?

Basic Instinct 2‘s playing in the background now, and you and I both know that all the t-n-a won’t save this ship (neither can the gorgeous Charlotte Rampling). But there was a time where I’d deconstruct a movie as shallow as this one too. Where this would be film school. Every scene would be analyzed for shot selection, music, length, and so on. If the film failed at that level, then of course there was the old doo-hickey: make up your own dialog.

More and more often, I reserve my proper movie watching time for movies I know achieve greatness. This Sunday, for example, is Kurosawa day.

But what about the next generation’s Kurosawa? If all content is merely background noise now except the renowned greats, how will the new visionaries get noticed amid all the ruckus?

“I’m bored,” a Youtube surfer says. Once upon a time having so much choice at your fingertips was unheard of. Once upon a time all I got here were two channels with half an hour every Sunday morning reserved for Walt Disney cartoons. It was all good. Every single cricket match was a family event. Who watches TV anymore? We’ll just read the results on the RSS feed, they say. But that’s for another post.

My excuse is that I simply wouldn’t have seen Basic Instinct 2 if it intruded into my proper movie watching time. Who’d sink this stinker between Herzog and Egoyan?

And yet, once upon a time the sheen and gloss (it’s not a bad looking film, even if Sharon Stone is plastic) on display alone might have been enough.

Infinite choice only seems like Utopia. But I’m not complaining. Gift horse, and so on.

Written by Jesus Eastwood

May 11, 2009 at 1:19 pm